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A Victory for the Bisexual Community

Celebrating a day of visibility for people who love

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Ross Victory. (Photo courtesy Victory)

For Black and Latino Gay men, having that extra layer of cultural expectations — of being masculine and living up to the ideas of manhood — expectations that our fathers have put upon us since the day we are born, is nothing new.

Layer and layer of stereotypes and pressure that is passed on to us as we navigate through childhood.

But what about when the child is growing up questioning both desires for both male and females.

What about when the child is growing up with feelings of something they don’t know or hear much about – Bisexuality.

These are feelings that author and award-winning American recording artist, Ross Victory, knows all too well, as a 34 year-old Black Bisexual Male trying to live his truth in Los Angeles.

Victory is the author of father-son themed memoir, Views from the Cockpit: The Journey of a Son and bisexual themed Panorama: The Missing Chapter, where he examines his experiences around culture, race and his sexuality.

Using his talent and creativity proved to not only be therapeutic for Victory but also a powerful form of exploration about intersectionality within the LGBTQ+ community.

With his creative content, Victory is giving a much needed voice to an often ignored community within a community.

“Growing up Bisexual, even as a Pre-Teen in a Christian household who was always in church, I wasn’t even aware of what was going on or what was happening to me,” explained Victory.

He described that it’s almost like there is a separate closet for bisexuals, particularly in the Black community and that often it can give “Living on the DL” a whole new meaning, especially as he was growing up in his teens.

Victory recalled a time in college when he had an “Aha!” moment while he was seeing the school Psychologist and she referred to him as Bisexual. He then realized that he was and ended up coming out to his straight best friend and was met with doubt – “Guys can’t be Bisexual, only Women can,” his friend exclaimed.

This is something we see in society even now. Women can easily move into these intimate spaces with other women even in public, touching each other, and it doesn’t get called out.

Dealing with trying to come to terms with who he was and identify eventually caused him to become physically sick often and it wasn’t until he dealt with the grief of losing his father and his brother that he accepted his sexuality as a Bisexual Black man living in America.

Victory tapped into his creative juices to express what he was feeling inside and turned to writing and music, fueling his storytelling and ability to educate and express his own views of who he is and his place within the LGBTQ+ community as well as his relationship with his father as he was growing up full of expectations.

“Now I feel that my job is to shine a light on how I see myself in the midst of it all. I also think there should be spaces for Bisexual people to meet where they can be comfortable and meet other people just like them,” added Victory.

“You get to a point where it becomes less about meeting someone that is one or the other – Male or Female, and more about who do I want to date? Who is going to be there and show up during those hard times and what does that look like overall? Who am I connecting with?” added Victory.

Finding space to be himself can still be a challenge as well, even in a city like Los Angeles. Even here we question the authenticity of our Bisexual community family members and Victory knows firsthand what that feels like. Yet, he is open to continue to connect and immerse himself in the community.
As we near “Celebrate Bisexuality Day” on September 23, 2020, it’s important to make sure we are aware of the people around us or in our lives who are Bisexual and make space for them and their stories as continue to educate and learn more about the “B” community within our LGBTQ+ family.

Books and music from artists like Ross Victory should be shared and enjoyed not only with each other but our allies who sometimes might find it easier to understand other sectors of our community.

To learn more about Ross Victory or purchase his music and books you can go to his website: https://www.rossvictory.com

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Sports

Quinn destined to be 1st Trans Nonbinary Olympic medalist

“I’m so proud of my team,” Quinn told the CBC. “They’re my best friends. I’m so glad we’re bringing back a better medal than bronze.”

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Screenshot via CBC Sports

KASHIMA-SHI, JAPAN – Before this week ends, the world will know the name Quinn: They will be the first-ever trans nonbinary athlete to win an Olympic medal. 

Quinn already made history as the world’s first trans nonbinary athlete to compete in any Olympic games. Now they and their teammates are on their way to winning either silver or gold. All Team Canada has to do is defeat Sweden on Thursday as handily as it did the number one-ranked USWNT in a 1-0 shutout Monday. Lose, and they get the silver; Win, and Quinn and Team Canada take home gold. 

“I’m so proud of my team,” Quinn told the CBC. “They’re my best friends. I’m so glad we’re bringing back a better medal than bronze.” 

Reporters asked Quinn about the historic nature of their participation, but they were focused on supporting their teammates who have waited almost a decade for this moment. 

“I’m doing this for the people I grew up looking up to. Like Sincy,” they said. 

“We finally won,” said Captain Christine “Sincy” Sinclair. “For those of us who were part of the 2012 game, it was nice to get a little revenge in an Olympic semifinal.”

On the other side of the pitch, out USWNT legend Megan Rapinoe talked with NBC Sports about how it felt to lose to Canada: “It sucks,” she said. “It’s a bitter one to swallow. Obviously we never want to lose to Canada. I don’t think I’ve ever lost to Canada. So it’s a bitter one.”

Rapinoe is engaged to marry Team USA co-flag bearer and Seattle Storm sensation Sue Bird, the longest tenured player in the WNBA. She’s in Tokyo chasing her fifth gold medal, in what she said would be her last Olympics. Rapinoe has one, from London in 2012, where Team Canada suffered defeat and heartbreak. 

Until Monday, the American women hadn’t lost to Canada in two decades. They traveled to Tokyo as back-to-back defending World Cup champions, having not lost a single match in 44 tries. They hadn’t been shutout in four years.

Then Canada’s Jessie Fleming of London, Ontario converted a penalty kick in the 74th minute to score the only goal of Monday’s match, sending the ball past out American goalkeeper, Adrianna Franch.

So, for Team USA to have lost twice and get shutout three times, with bronze as their best hope? It’s a stunner for the iconic team with at least four out women: Rapinoe, Franch Tierna Davidson and Kelly O’Hara. 

For Quinn, this is also about showing the next generation what they can get from playing sports. 

“Athletics is the most exciting part of my life and it brings me the most joy,” Quinn told CBC Sports on Monday. “If I can allow kids to play the sports they love, that’s my legacy and that’s what I’m here for.”

Also Monday, weightlifter Laurel Hubbard of New Zealand became the first out transgender woman to compete in any Olympic Games. Unfortunately, her history-making appearance was short.

Hubbard, 43, had three chances to advance in “the snatch” first round of the Women’s Super Heavyweight Division competition in Tokyo Monday, but failed to complete a lift that counted. She was the only one of the 13 finalists to not complete at least one lift in the competition that was ultimately won by China’s Li Wenwen.

Before leaving the stage, Hubbard pounded her chest and made a heart gesture with her hands, sending a message of gratitude to the judges, the audience and everyone watching online and on television around the world. 

Photo courtesy New Zealand Olympic Team

Later, Hubbard told reporters she was grateful to the International Olympic Committee, which supported her entry and last week declared, “Trans women are women.” 

“Of course, I’m not entirely unaware of the controversy which surrounds my participation in these Games,” Hubbard said after leaving the competition. “And, as such, I’d particularly like to thank the IOC, for, I think, really affirming their commitment to the principles of Olympism, and establishing that sport is something for all people. It is inclusive. It is accessible.”

The International Weightlifting Federation also earned Hubbard’s thanks, she said, because “they too have shown that weightlifting is an activity that’s open to all of the people in the world.”

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Sports

Out Olympian Kenworthy & Paralympian Dunkin on Tokyo & LGBTQ Sports

“The fact that LGBTQ youth drop out of sports at twice the rate of their heterosexual & gender counterparts, it doesn’t have to be that way.”

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Screenshot via Los Angeles Blade

TOKYO – Gus Kenworthy is in Tokyo for the Summer Games, but not to compete. The  Olympic Gold Medalist recently joined Paralympian Gold Medalist Abby Dunkin in a Zoom conversation with Athlete Ally founder and executive director Hudson Taylor and the head of LGBTQ+ equality and inclusion for Procter & Gamble, Brent Miller. 

“I felt like I knew that if I came out, there must be someone else,” Kenworthy said. “I was like, there’s someone else in skiing or an action sports or another kid who is going to resonate with my story. And if I can even help one person, then it will be worth it.”

This group of athletes and allies tackled the difficult issues of coming out in sports, fears of rejection, suicide attempts and competing authentically as well as the controversy over transgender inclusion in sports, both at the Olympics and in high schools and colleges across the U.S. 

“Only 24% of LGBTQ youth participate in sports,” noted Taylor. “The fact that LGBTQ youth drop out of sports at twice the rate of their heterosexual and gender counterparts, it doesn’t have to be that way.”

Dunkin credited Paralympian gold medalist Stephanie Wheeler as an inspiration both on the court and in everyday life as an out lesbian. 

“Stephanie really creates such a great environment for me and other athletes and also our staff, too, that were out at the time,” said Dunkin. “And that really impacted me to come out and be myself.“ Wheeler is also head coach of the Univ. of Illinois women’s wheelchair basketball team. 

As the Los Angeles Blade has reported, there are more than 142 out LGBTQ athletes competing in Tokyo, a record for any Olympic Games. And with trans nonbinary soccer player Quinn on their way to a potential gold medal, making history with out trans woman Laurel Hubbard and out trans BMX competitor Chelsea Wolfe in Tokyo, Miller says their first steps are inspiring to people all around the world, no matter what their gender identity or sexual orientation is. 

“It’s about bringing people together, supporting people, creating mutual understanding, and really celebrating all of humanity,” Miller said. “And now for us, bringing those LGBTQ+ stories forward is critically important because we see the value of what sport can bring.”

Watch their conversation with sports editor Dawn Ennis by clicking here.

Equal Representation in Sports: Why LGBTQ+ Visibility Matters

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Music & Concerts

Rapper DaBaby pulled by Lollapalooza over homophobic comments

“Lollapalooza was founded on diversity, inclusivity, respect, and love. With that in mind, DaBaby will no longer be performing.”

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Screenshot from Rolling Stone Magazine's YouTube Channel

CHICAGO – In an announcement Sunday morning, the organizers of Chicago’s Lollapalooza Music Festival said they had pulled artist DaBaby from tonight’s closing show after a series of public homophobic remarks by the rapper last weekend in Miami at the Rolling Loud music festival.

On Twitter Lollapalooza officials wrote; “Lollapalooza was founded on diversity, inclusivity, respect, and love. With that in mind, DaBaby will no longer be performing at Grant Park tonight.  Young Thug will now perform at 9:00pm on the Bud Light Seltzer Stage, and G Herbo will perform at 4:00pm on the T-Mobile Stage.”

The Grammy-nominated rapper’s comments onstage at the Miami festival last weekend brought swift condemnation from other artists in the music industry including British Rockstar Elton John and Madonna among many others.

In the middle of his set last weekend in Miami the rapper told the crowd, “If you didn’t show up today with HIV/AIDS, or any of them deadly sexually transmitted diseases, that’ll make you die in two to three weeks, then put your cellphone lighter up! Ladies, if your pussy smell like water, put your cellphone lighter up! Fellas, if you ain’t sucking dick in the parking lot, put your cellphone lighter up!”

DaBaby later issued an apology via Twitter that read, “Anybody who done ever been effected by AIDS/HIV y’all got the right to be upset, what I said was insensitive even though I have no intentions on offending anybody. So my apologies” However, the addendum in the same tweet of; “But the LGBT community… I ain’t trippin on y’all, do you. y’all business is y’all business.” was immediately decried as further proof of the rapper’s intolerance of the LGBTQ community.

Michael J. Stern, a Los Angeles attorney and a former federal prosecutor who is now a noted featured columnist for USA Today blasted DaBaby’s ‘apology;’

In his response to Dababy’s remarks Elton John, who founded the Elton John AIDS Foundation in 1992, a nonprofit organization which funds frontline partners to prevent infections, fight stigma and provide care for the most vulnerable groups affected by HIV, responded in a lengthy series of tweets:

Madonna took to her Instagram telling the rapper to “know your facts,” before spreading misinformation. 

“AIDs is not transmitted by standing next to someone in a crowd,” she wrote on Instagram. “I want to put my cellphone lighter up and pray for your ignorance, No one dies of AIDS in 2 or 3 weeks anymore. Thank God.”

This year’s Lollapalooza festival, which is one of the first major festivals to return in full force since the start of the coronavirus pandemic in the United States, concludes Sunday with headlining performances by musical acts Brockhampton, the Foo Fighters, and Modest Mouse.

Dua Lipa ‘Horrified’ at DaBaby’s Homophobic Remarks at Rolling Loud | RS News 7/28/21

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