a&e features
‘Better’ than ever: an interview with Harvey Fierstein
Beloved actor on pandemic, Broadway history and new biography
One of the best things about reading a memoir by someone with a distinctive voice – both spoken and written – is that you hear them as your read their book. Let’s face it, award-winning writer and actor Harvey Fierstein qualifies as someone who has a distinctive voice and while reading his revelatory memoir, “I Was Better Last Night” (Knopf, 2022), you’d swear he was in the room with you, dishing away. Harvey was gracious enough to make time for an interview shortly before the book’s March 2022 publication date.
BLADE: Harvey, why was now the time to write your memoir, “I Was Better Last Night,” and does having a milestone birthday (70) in 2022 have anything to do with it?
HARVEY FIERSTEIN: What’s really funny is that so many sources, if you look online, have my birthday as 1954, even though it’s actually 1952. The reason is that when I turned 22, my friend Eric Conklin, who directed the original production of “Torch Song,” said “You should tell everybody you’re turning 21.” I said, “Why?” He said, “Because if you lie when you’re older, nobody believes it. But if you start at 21, who the fuck’s going to care!” That year, I moved my birthday to ‘53. The next year, we decided we’d do it again. But I never took it seriously. Things just get picked up by this one or that one. I think it was in New York magazine that they got the facts wrong and said my parents were Eastern European immigrants. They were actually third-generation Americans. But it got picked up by everyone and everywhere it said I was the son of Eastern European immigrants. My mother was born in Brooklyn and my father was born in the Catskills. So, I wrote the book, and there’s a fact checker, of course. Every time I mentioned my age he sent back a note, “Wikipedia says you were born in ‘54. This one says you were born in ’54,” I had to keep saying, “Why would I lie and make myself older? I’d only make myself younger!” It’s another one of those examples of why you should never lie. I am indeed as old as the mountains. So, did I write the memoir because of the birthday? No. Like everybody else in the fucking world, this pandemic hit. I was a very good boy. I sat down and did all the work on my desk. At that time, we were supposed to be doing a production of “Bye Bye Birdie” at the Kennedy Center. I finished the rewrites on that. I had rewritten “Funny Girl,” which was done in London and then went on tour in England, and we were bringing it to Broadway. I wanted to make some more changes to it, so I got all those changes done. “Kinky Boots” was sold to cruise ships, so I had to do an adaptation, a shortening of the show, as I had already done for “Hairspray” and other shows. That was off my desk and done. I’m working on a new musical with Alan Menken and Jeff Feldman, the guys I wrote “Newsies” with.
BLADE: Yes, I read about that in the book.
FIERSTEIN: So, I was all caught up with that. Basically, I was done. Then I sat down and, as I say in the book, I make quilts. I owed a couple of quilts as gifts. I went down to my little sewing room and I made seven quilts in a row [laughs]. Usually, I turn out one a year. Everybody got their birthday quilts, their wedding quilts, whatever it was that was owed. I had cleared my desk and we were still in the pandemic. Then my agent said to me, “Why don’t you write your memoir?” I said, “Because I don’t write sentences.”
BLADE: You wrote the children’s book. That has sentences.
FIERSTEIN: But that’s kid sentences. I’ve written op-eds, but for that you just have to get the voice of Edward R. Murrow in your head or something like that. That’s like writing dialogue, as well. All of a sudden, you’re Aaron Sorkin. I thought, “What the fuck? I’ve got a computer. Let me try.” I wrote four chapters, and I sent them to my agent. She said, “This is great!” She sent the chapters out to I think nine publishers, and eight of the nine made offers.
BLADE: There are numerous powerful moments throughout the book. Without giving away too much…
FIERSTEIN: Oh, go ahead, give it away! I already know what happens.
BLADE: But I don’t want to spoil it for the readers.
FIERSTEIN: That’s right. Goddammit.
BLADE: Chapter 57 contains one of the most emotional sequences involving your parents. Would it be fair to say that writing the book was a cathartic experience?
FIERSTEIN: Yes, the whole thing really is. When I started, I asked Shirley MacLaine because she’s written 300 books about her 700 different lives. She said, “Write what you remember because your brain has a way of editing, and it will give you what you need for this book. You’ll remember things for other books and other things, but write what you remember and just be true to what comes up.” I said, “Even about other people?” She said, “Yes. When you’re writing about other people, you’re really writing about yourself. Just trust that.” That’s what I did. There were hundreds of stories that I could have told. I just tried to sort of follow a line of thought and let it be.
BLADE: That’s interesting because the chapters in “I Was Better Last Night” are presented in chronological order, beginning in 1959 and concluding in 2022. Is that how they were written?
FIERSTEIN Yes, I wrote it exactly as it is. As you say, that particular chapter, I knew was coming because I knew what happened to bring that memory back. I’m trying to say it as you said, to not give it away. What happened between me and my brother, when he sat down to watch the last revival of “Torch Song.” My editor was incredibly gentle with me. Now and then he’d say, add more here or there. But the only real note that I got from him was he wanted to move that story into chronological order since the rest of the book is. I said, “No. That’s in emotional order.”
BLADE: It needed to be where it was.
FIERSTEIN: Exactly! Most celebrity autobiographies begin “I was a kid and I saw a show and I said, ‘I wanna be a star, too!’” Which is obviously not my story. I never wanted to be in show business. I didn’t want to be a writer. I didn’t want to be an actor or a drag performer. It was not my dream at all. That’s why it was so important to do it chronologically. I wanted to show how I lived my life being true to the moment I was in.
BLADE: In “I Was Better Last Night” you take readers on a journey through modern theater, from The Gallery Players and La Mama to off-Broadway and Broadway. With that in mind, would you agree that in addition to being a memoir, the book also functions as a theater history lesson?
FIERSTEIN: I guess it does. I have certainly been told that by a bunch of people who’ve read the book. When I was talking to Patti LuPone about it, she said, “Geez, I wish I had done what you did. She came through theater school and right into the legitimate, not through the experimental. As I say in the book, I came from an art school, so I always approached it as an art. Theater was part of an art movement, and I got involved because I wanted to meet Andy Warhol. Little did I know they would put me in drag. I guess there is a history there. Certainly, when I look around me, and I look at the people that I grew up with – Kathleen Chalfant and Obba Babatundé — and, of course, La Mama became something bigger. There were lots of others. Meeting Matthew (Broderick) at 18, or Estelle Getty who was a housewife from Bayside, Queens. She wouldn’t even admit she was from Bayside. She told everybody she was from Long Island [big laugh]. I said, “Estelle! Bayside is in Queens. Shut up!” What is history? After all, history is just day after day after day after day. I did start, as a baby, in this experimental theater. I wish that experimental theater still really existed. There were a few of us that I would say destroyed off-off-Broadway. I think greed is what destroyed off-off-Broadway. I think what happened was when people saw Tom O’Horgan make it, when “Hair” became a hit, that had a lot of people going, “Where’s my ‘Hair’?”
BLADE: But don’t you think that experimental theater might exist in cities where it’s a little more affordable to do that kind of thing? Say, Austin, Texas.
FIERSTEIN: There will always be experimental theater. It’s just, how is it looked at? Is the government funding there for it? I hear a lot of people saying, “Let’s not waste money on theater.” “Torch Song Trilogy” wouldn’t have been what it was if not for a government grant. I don’t know if you know this, but I just gave a grant to the New York Public Library at Lincoln Center to build a theater laboratory because rehearsal space is incredibly expensive in New York and almost impossible to find. David Rockwell is designing it and I’m hoping it’ll be open in two years. I tell a story in the book about how years ago we were rehearsing up at the YMCA, and the director just disappeared and left us with the bill for the rehearsal room. If I can leave a rehearsal room behind… Lin-Manuel (Miranda) developed “Hamilton” in the basement of the Drama Book Shop. For my shows, I used the basement of La Mama which was this small space, but big enough for us to rehearse and develop what we needed to do. I even did a couple of shows down there.
BLADE: Chapters 19 through 22 give readers insight into the inspiration for and the writing of “Torch Song Trilogy” and then much later you write about the recent revival with Michael Urie. What was it like to revisit the creation and the revision of “Torch Song Trilogy?”
FIERSTEIN: They’re your children, so they never really leave you. You may not think about them in the same way all the time, but they don’t leave you. You ask a mother about her son when he was six, and she can tell you a story about that time. It doesn’t mean you live with those stories every day. But they’re always there. Unfortunately, as you get older and people die on you, you remember them, or you go back to those stories time and again to remember how you all met and all that. With something like Torch Song, which is so much a part of my life, there was no real shock to going back and looking at that stuff again. Seeing Michael do it was not a shock either, because I cast all of my understudies. The show ran on Broadway for five years, but I didn’t play it all five years. There were other Arnolds and I saw all of them. There were matinee Arnolds, and then we had a bus and truck tour, and a regular tour. I saw all of those guys play it. I saw it in London with Tony Sher, who died a few weeks ago. He won the Olivier for “Torch Song.” Writing a memoir is not a time to blame other people [laughs]. When you’re writing plays, it is.
BLADE: I’m so glad you said that because one of the things that I think will strike readers about “I Was Better Last Night” is the brutal honesty with which you write about alcoholism and sobriety, as well as your suicide attempt. What do you hope readers will take away from that?
FIERSTEIN: There’s a certain point when you’re writing something like that…I don’t really care [laughs]. I needed to tell the truth and you hope that the truth will do good. When you’re writing fiction, you care more about how it’s read and what somebody gets out of the fiction. When you’re writing non-fiction, it’s like, “This is what happened, like it or not, Cookie.” The only hope is that I hope you know I’m telling it the best I can and being truthful. Because the truth does affect people, that I know. When you’re writing drama, you are manipulating an audience, and a story, and emotions. When I was writing the book, of course, there’s still an art to it, but I’m not turning away from something because it’s not comfortable. I’m going to say it. If somebody thinks I’m an asshole, let them think I’m an asshole. You read the book, and thank you very much for doing so.
BLADE: That’s my job!
FIERSTEIN: You see in the book that I don’t have an answer for my own gender. Had I been born in 1980, instead of 1952, would I be a woman now? I don’t know. I don’t have those answers. I don’t have the luxury of being born in a different society. The first (trans) person I knew was Christine Jorgensen, who died owing me money, that bitch [laughs]. When I was writing the book, I was going through photographs. There’s a picture in the book of me and Marsha P. Johnson and Jon Jon marching in a Gay Pride march. I put that picture up and somebody wrote to me telling me about Marsha, like you should know who this person was. I was like, “What are you talking about? This was a friend of mine!”
BLADE: Thank you for mentioning pictures. I live four blocks south of Wilton Manors in Fort Lauderdale. In the book you include a photo of the WiltonArt.com street sign that features a quote by you. What does it mean to you to be immortalized in this way?
FIERSTEIN: While it’s very flattering, another place I looked had it that Walt Whitman said it! With one hand, you’re flattered, and with the other, you’re slapped across the face.
BLADE: At least they got the attribution right in Wilton Manors.
FIERSTEIN: That’s lovely, it really is lovely. It’s a lovely thing to see something link that. I was watching some interview with Billy Porter and as if by accident, they walked down the block where there was a mural on the side of a building of his portrait. As if, “Oh, I didn’t know that was there!” You sort of laugh, like, yeah, right! You brought a film crew because you didn’t know your picture was there on the wall [laughs]. That sort of stuff of celebrity is always funny. Especially when you have friends who are famous and you try to just be human beings together, but then you go out in public, and you realize that they mean a whole other thing to the public than to you.
a&e features
Reality star Bill Alverson discusses pageants and parenting
‘Coach Charming’ himself breaks down what it means to be a gay parent today.
In the Bill Alverson’s own words, he spends each day as a ‘walking paradox’; Alverson puts in long hours at his law office, conducts countless appointments as one of the country’s premier pageant coaches, and still makes time to appear on Lifetime’s hit reality series A Sorority Mom’s Guide to Rush!
This isn’t the first time the legal professional has graced TV — he had his own series in 2015 and produced the Netflix hit Insatiable — but his appearances on television are more impactful now than any of his before. Finally, Bill gets to greet viewers as the proud gay man he is today.
From the struggles of America’s legal system to the cutthroat world of beauty pageants, the Los Angeles Blade sat down with Alverson to hear about his coming out journey and how he’s been navigating his sexuality, his many pursuits, and his role as a father (all while appearing on numerous reality shows over the years). He offered ample advice to other queer parents on what it means to put your child first while still respecting your own identity. And, in regard to his long career that grows by the day, Bill makes something very clear: no matter how many shows he’s on or pageants he helps people win, his family always comes first.
“I grew up in a small town in South Alabama…in 2016, the highest percentage per capita that voted for Trump was my county,” explained Alverson, when discussing why it took him so many years to come out. “I didn’t even know what the word bisexual was!” He first grabbed national attention back in 2015 with his reality show Coach Charming, a TLC series that saw the attorney take a break from practicing law to mentor debutantes across the country. Audiences quickly fell in love with this hilarious personality; when he wasn’t showing off his bombastic coaching style or critiquing modern pageantry, each episode showed the idyllic life Bill lived with his wife and three children in Alabama. Viewers quickly fell in love with this family man and the epitome of Southern charm that was his daily life, which is why so many were shocked when he was outed as gay shortly after the first season finale.
While able to joke about it now, Bill described the trauma of his colleagues allegedly outing him to their local community. “When I did Coach Charming, my law firm [allegedly] hacked into my computer…and found out I was gay.” Said Bill. “We were the oldest firm in Alabama at the time, and I was one of the youngest partners…[and] one of them literally told me to ‘get out of town’.” This came during a time when Bill had already opened up to his wife about his sexuality, when the man had been preparing his own public statement to come out to fans on his terms. Because of this alleged invasion of privacy, what could have been a milestone in reality television was instead a personal explosion for Bill and everyone he loved the most.
Eventually, he was able to recover. He capitalized on his newly public sexuality and, after an amicable divorce with his wife (who remains a close friend to this day), began dating men and pursuing new projects as his most authentic self. This led to camp classics like Netflix’s teen comedy Insatiable or his current role on A Sorority Mom’s Guide to Rush!. But even though Bill was able to navigate his new reality with pride, he knew that above all else, he had to make sure his children were as safe and happy as he is now.
Bill didn’t try to rationalize or smooth over his children’s emotions when they struggled with his sexuality. “I [said] to [my daughter], ‘You know what? I didn’t have a road map. I’m sorry I put you through that, and you have a right to be angry.’” He had a version of this conversation with each of his children, small and large confrontations where they questioned his identity and the unwanted national attention his outing had on their family. Bill approached each with a similar candor, stating the key to helping them understand his experience that every queer parent should know: “It all has to come from being honest.”
Alverson quickly learned a hard truth about being a queer parent: your pride can’t just be for yourself. “Are you winning the battle to lose the war?” He asked, when speaking about the times he wasn’t as open about his sexuality because he knew it would lead to his kids suffering with their peers. Bill clarified that he never hid his identity — “I’m like, ‘Who’s the parent, and who’s the child?’” he joked, when describing the times he had to tell his children that he wouldn’t go ‘back in the closet’ for their comfort. But he also learned that when you’re a gay parent, pride is a conversation, an ongoing journey that has to account for not only your experience but that of the children you’re raising. There’s no one way to do it, and he’s experienced many issues with his kids over the years in trying to maneuver life as a gay father. But by respecting their feelings and speaking to them like the young adults they are, he’s been able to turn his journey of self-discovery into a trip the entire family is taking together.
Bill Alverson has established himself as a true powerhouse of reality TV, showing up to inject various shows with his unique brand of Southern sass while still taking the time to defend clients as a practicing attorney. He’s a modern model of truly ‘having it all,’ and throughout his interview, the man reiterated that none of this would be possible without the family who has stood by him every step of the way. His sense of pride is a familial one, and for every other parent struggling to share their authentic identities with their children, he says, “Be the friend you’d want to have — not what makes you happy, but what would make them happy.”
a&e features
Best of LA DJ of the Year & queer creative Cazwell gets candid on & embracing his Daddy Era
Legendary queer music artist Cazwell takes home the Best of LA’s DJ of the Year award just in time to release his latest LP HITS ALL OVER YOUR FACE [The Peace Bisquit Collection].
Music is magic. It has the power to transform minds, uplift spirits, and unite communities. In a time of too much discord, good music has the potential to provide us with some much-needed harmony. For many marginalized communities, this harmonious energy is not only an instrument of healing but also an amplifier for our collective voice, no autotune necessary. For decades, rapper, producer, and songwriter Cazwell has been dropping dearly queerly tracks, from Loose Wrists to Rice & Beans, melting both our hearts and our ice cream with every beat. It is to absolutely nobody’s surprise that our beloved bicoastal babe has snagged himself the Best of LGBTQ+ LA 2025 award for DJ of the Year (congrats!)
We sat down with Cazwell and talked about the importance of trans empowerment, bringing his East Coast vibe to the West Coast sunshine, and the anticipated release of his latest LP. Sink your teeth in – this one’s going to get all over your face…
Congrats on winning DJ of the Year by the Los Angeles Blade’s Best of LGBTQ+ LA 2025. How does it feel to be recognized for your influence and impact on the queer music scene?
Thank you, Los Angeles Blade and Best of L.A. Awards! I feel recognized for how much I’ve grown as a DJ. I’m very grateful for getting a Saturday night residency at Hi Tops (West Hollywood). The unpretentious atmosphere gives me permission to take chances and surprise the crowd. When it comes to my music, I’ve been told by some gay people in music that I’ve inspired them to keep going with their craft. It feels good to know that I’ve made a positive impact.
Your sound and visuals have always pushed boundaries and tightened trousers. What fuels your creativity, and how has it evolved throughout your career?
I think what fuels my creativity is that I enjoy the process. I get less satisfaction from observing the work I’ve done compared to when I am taking the steps to make it happen. When my head is wrapped up in the world of making a song or filming a music video, time kind of stands still, and that’s when I feel my most powerful. Making music always gives me the opportunity to talk about the life I want to have or the confidence I want to have, and then I get it from the power of the song. Or maybe it was always there, and I had to just dig it up. I’m not sure, but it works for me.
Can you give us a taste of your latest LP, HITS ALL OVER YOUR FACE [The Peace Bisquit Collection]? What themes can we expect, and how does it reflect where you are in your life?
HITS ALL OVER YOUR FACE [The Peace Bisquit Collection] gave me the opportunity to look back at all I’ve done and give myself a little pat on the shoulder, which I rarely do so for my mental health. It was a positive thing. For me personally, the double album is a reflection of how Peace Bisquit has helped me navigate through my decision-making with music production. I’m very proud of it. I looked at the compilation track listing and said to myself, “Damn! I’ve made a lot of great songs!”
Your fashion and visuals are just as iconic as your music. How do you define your style these days, and who or what inspires it?
Well, now I am certainly in my “Daddy Era.” I’ve been pulling a lot of inspiration from 90’s movies like Trainspotting and Fight Club. I also pay attention to a lot of Japanese fashion and always seem to have my head in a Japanese fashion magazine like “Popeye.” Besides that, I’ve learned that no matter what I wear, if I’m not happy with my body, I’m always hiding something. So now my perspective is to be as healthy and fit as I can, and I will feel and look good.
You’ve collaborated with many talented artists. Who is on your dream list that you haven’t worked with yet?
I want to work with Charli XCX. I was just listening to the BRAT album yesterday, and it still hits hard. I’ve been a fan of hers for years and years, and watching her excel and morph into this party girl-raver-superstar has been amazing. I want to write a song with her just to learn. I can’t wait to see what she drops next.
You’ve always been unapologetically queer in your work, especially at a time when visibility wasn’t always celebrated. What does queer visibility in music mean to you today?
Visibility and queer music need to be protected. To me, it means empowerment and not keeping silent, no matter who you make feel uncomfortable. There’s nothing much more powerful than music when it comes to strengthening your mental health. I’ve always wanted to use my music to make gay people feel just as entitled and cocky as straight people do when they rap or sing.
In a political climate that is increasingly hostile toward LGBTQ+ rights, do you feel a new type of urgency in your work as both an artist and public figure?
The urgency has always been there, but they’re coming for trans people first. The most important thing that all artists – gay and straight – can do right now is use their visibility to bring attention to protecting trans people. And that doesn’t just mean wearing a “Protect The Dolls” t-shirt and calling it a day. It means putting them in their songs, their videos, and finding a way to donate money or time to causes that help trans people. Let trans people know that they are loved and cared for anyway you can.
Have there been aspects of your background (cultural, regional, or familial) that you’ve consciously brought into your work, or that you’ve had to push against?
Well, most recently, I’ve been bringing my Polish heritage into my work, wearing a Polska red and white jogging suit in my “Daddy” videos for social media. I’ve always loved that Eastern European look of the guy with the shaved head in a jogging suit looking like a total asshole, lol. I think it’s funny and sexy in its own way. The influence that New York has instilled in my attitude will affect me forever. I’m still hustling to get all my work done like a New Yorker while some of these West Coast kids are waking up at 2 pm every day thinking about brunch.
In today’s conversations around representation and intersectionality, how do you see your place (or your responsibility) as someone who’s broken boundaries in both mainstream and underground spaces?
Our government is trying to get rid of any piece of history that celebrates people of color and the LGBTQ community. It is important for gay artists to recognize that the majority of the genius that comes from our music was birthed from the Black queer community and to pay them respect every opportunity we have. I also feel it’s my responsibility to mentor young queer artists any time I can. I’ll try to give advice or give my thoughts on their work when they ask me. Many young artists don’t have anyone in their circle to just give them constructive criticism or even uplift them and tell them how talented they are. I think everyone needs that.
You’ve spent time on both coasts. Do you consider yourself more East Coast or West Coast at heart? How have the scenes in NYC and LA influenced you differently, both musically and personally?
I’m definitely more East Coast. I’m a New Yorker till the day I die. Los Angeles has given me the opportunity to relax and gather my thoughts as opposed to always being in a competitive hustle just to keep a DJ gig and pay rent on time. I miss the vibration of New York, but I wouldn’t trade it for the mental clarity that I’ve been able to develop on the West Coast. Hopefully, someday I’ll be bi-coastal.
What’s something fans might be surprised to learn about you, either in the booth or outside the spotlight?
I think the thing that would surprise them the most is that I haven’t had sex in over a year. Partly by choice and partly because I prefer to have sexual relationships with somebody I admire, and I haven’t been able to find that in a long time. It was definitely easier on the East Coast, but I’ve been working on myself a lot lately, so I don’t feel like I’m missing out on anything.
What’s your message to younger queer artists navigating the music industry right now?
Don’t try to perfect your work. It will never happen. Enjoy the process and don’t be afraid to suck. No artist that’s been in the game for years wants to listen to their early pieces of work because it feels so cringe. Just keep making music. Keep putting out art. Don’t focus on the outcome. Just focus on the vision you’ve received because you got this calling for a reason.
a&e features
Harvey Guillén gets honest about ‘What We Do in the Shadows’ acting snub, fashion double standards and queer representation
Guillén sees voiceover work as less exclusionary: “All your talent is based not on what you look like.”
Harvey Guillén has had quite the extraordinary year, from making one last stop at the Emmys for the sixth and final season of the hilarious What We Do in the Shadows, acting alongside Lukas Gage and Sophie Thatcher in the horror comedy Companion, to continuing to voice act in shows like Harley Quinn and Mickey Mouse Funhouse.
But he’s only just getting started.
“I guess in my head, I have so much more to do,” Guillén tells The Blade after receiving the Truth Icon Award at the Raizado Festival back in August. “I’m just getting started, and then when they read out 70-something film and show credits to my name, I was like, ‘What!’ Because I’m not keeping score of the projects I’m doing. It blew my mind because in my head, I constantly think this is just the beginning.”
Guillén brings flair to every red carpet and has the goal of becoming the first queer Latino person nominated at the Emmys for best supporting actor in a comedy. But beyond his on-screen visibility, the L.A.-native recognizes the unique opportunity voice acting provides.
“Imagine a place where you can be creative, where all your talent is based not on what you look like, not how tall you are, not your background — just your voice,” Guillén says, reflecting on notable roles in Puss in Boots: The Last Wish and Wish. “And that’s appealing, because voiceover is the hardest place to get into. It’s the one place that’s even more welcoming than any of the other departments.”
Guillén sat down with The Blade to unpack the evolution of his red carpet looks, saying goodbye to his What We Do in the Shadows family, only recently being allowed back in his Altadena home following the devastating wildfires, and wanting to inspire other queer Latino men with both his on-screen and voice acting work. This interview has been edited and condensed.
You’ve had an incredible year, and I’d love to start off by hearing about the inspiration for your red carpet fashion. It really stands out.
That was Harry Haleen, and I think he’s a great, amazing designer. We just work with what we already have. As a big boy, I always like to accentuate curves, and we wanted to do this sharp shoulder, bringing it back to the ‘80s Dynasty moment, but also a plunging neckline, which made it into a corset-looking top. The high-waisted pants gave this cool, almost triangle-cinch look. The pants and outfit were really comfortable to be in, and I had a long, draping cape attached to these pants. When you look in the front, you see pants, and then when you walk away, you see a gown.
I started working with my stylist, Melvin, after years of styling myself. I finally found someone who wanted to show off and make a good impression with fashion choices. That was never an option for me because no one wanted to dress up a big guy. No one would want to take a chance, or their answer was always, “We just don’t know where to shop for you.” That’s ridiculous — fashion should be for everyone, not just for sample-size models. So this whole year, we’ve taken that journey together. We want to make it clear that fashion is for everyone, and the big boys can be fashionable.
What We Do in the Shadows ended this past year with its sixth season. How do you look back on your experience being a part of that show for so many reasons and receiving so many Emmy nominations?
We’ve been doing this for six seasons, and it really felt bittersweet because every time we go to the Emmys, we see a new show come on board, we meet them and they’re always so nice. From Abbott Elementary and Quinta Brunson coming up to us and saying how much they love the show when their first season was on the air — now she’s become a friend — to Seth Rogen from The Studio saying how much he loves the show. And vice versa. You know, comedy is hard. Amy Poehler recently said that sometimes the Academy Awards snub comedies and don’t really take them seriously. I think that’s not fair because making people cry is easy, making people laugh is hard. Because our show had such a specific storyline with vampires, sometimes what got lost in the recognition was taking it as a serious show. Because the writing is incredible, the acting is phenomenal, yet everything but the actors got nominated. We never got nominations except last year, for the first time, Matt Berry got the nomination. We were rooting for him, we were all rooting for you! We wanted him to take home the award, and it didn’t happen. But we at least got the nomination.
For me personally, it was a goal because I wanted to be the first queer Latino to be nominated for a supporting role in a comedy. That would have made history. And so even if I didn’t win, I was like, “At least if I get nominated, we’ll make history.” That’d be cool to open the door for another queer Latino who comes after me, and it didn’t happen.
Hopefully, that history can be made soon. I also know you’re an L.A. native, and your Altadena house was damaged in the January fires. There have been struggling production rates, and the ICE raids. What has it been like to see all these changes in L.A. and also these moments where people have come together to support the community?
It’s been tough. It’s been a rough year. I was just allowed to come back to my home about a month ago. They finally gave us the green light to go. My house was damaged, and the property was all damaged. The night it happened was kind of traumatizing because they didn’t evacuate our side of town in Altadena. I was in my home, I got rid of my car a long time ago, and I was looking out the window. We started rehearsal that day for Anything Goes at the Pasadena Playhouse with Jinkx Monsoon, and we stopped abruptly and said, “There’s been a warning for Altadena.” We canceled rehearsal, went home, and said, “Everyone, go take care of what you have to take care of, and we’ll see you guys tomorrow.” We never went back to rehearsal.
I went back home and saw a red ball of fire in the distance. I was like, “That is way too close,” and they didn’t evacuate us. The winds were 100 miles per hour that night, and there were sparks in the air, amber falling from the sky. I remember thinking, “I just bought this house. I’m a first-generation homeowner.” I had just shown this house to my Mom and tricked her over the Christmas break to think that I had rented an Airbnb, and then when she got to the Airbnb, I told her I bought it. To see her face, to see that her son bought a home in America for the first time… it was very sentimental. I just remember thinking of all that, going back in the backyard and asking ancestors to look after my house.
It’s almost like a distraction to myself to create a distraction for others, because I distract myself by creating a movie, show, or comedy. It’s therapeutic for me to not be focused so much every day on the insanity that is insurance and fire and all that. But along the way, we wanted to use the arts to help, so I did an evening where we raised money for street vendors, who are also being affected by ICE in Southern California. We also did a read of Superbad streaming online with Gloria Calderón [Kellett] to raise money, to donate money to organizations that help people. Just getting back to some kind of normality, which is hard this year with ICE and the fires and everything. And also, where we are with the State of the Union and just in general as human beings. It’s been a tough year, but one thing I’ve learned is that in times like this — in history, in the future — you’ll always need an escape. That means entertainment and actors are more important than ever. We are needed. I’m not a first responder, but what I can do is provide an escape, and I’ll continue to do that as long as I can.
That’s a great way of putting it. Another issue that California has been struggling with is trying to get production back in the state. I know many Emmy-winning shows like The Studio and Hacks were campaigning on the fact that they were shot on location. For you as an actor, is keeping filming local important to you?
Yeah, absolutely. I always say it’s so funny that every day, we have planes that land in L.A. with a new writer, actor, model, and dancer with these dreams of joining this amazing profession. And yet they get here, they’re outsourced to Alabama, to Spain, to Toronto. I can count the number of times that I’ve shot in Los Angeles in one hand for the last decade.
Oh wow.
I consider myself very lucky and privileged to work as often as I do, because as history has shown you, statistically-proven, someone who looks like me, with my background, with my sexuality, should not be successful in this business because they have made it harder for us by diminishing our stories and saying that those stories aren’t welcome. I don’t take it lightly; it’s not lost on me how lucky I am. It’s just you have to constantly be working at the next gig, trying to get the next gig, and all those gigs are never in L.A. because everything has been outsourced. I shot a movie in Spain last Fall. Shadows was shot in Toronto for seven years of my life. I might as well get dual citizenship in Canada!
This is the entertainment capital of the world. I noticed recently that used to be the slogan for Universal Studios, the actual theme park where they make movies. They legally can’t say that anymore; they can’t even stand by their own words. You can’t even say that because it’s a lie; it’s no longer the entertainment capital, but it was built on that. And the idea that this town is so expensive to live in, and you make it even harder to live and work in. It’s a little bit greedy, you know? This city is built on entertainers. You can’t even be an entertainer and live here, right? You have to live in Milwaukee or Texas and then fly in to wherever they’re going to shoot. And if you do that, you’re going to lose what L.A. was based on. That’s scary because the other source of this city was built on immigrants from all over the world.
As you look forward, you mentioned your goal of representing queer Latino men on screen. What kind of roles do you want to take on, and where are you hoping your career will take you?
I would like to think that when people see me on screen, they’re inspired to do anything they want to do. My biggest thing is when I have people come up to me at Comic Con — men, women, trans, non-binary — they say something like, “When I see you, I feel seen. When I see you just living your life full of joy, I see it is possible that I can also be that.” That’s really amazing to hear because when I started this, I didn’t start to necessarily do that, but after I was aware that just by living and doing you every day, you could be inspiring someone who’s going through a hard time. You could be the inspiration someone needs to be an inspiration to someone else — It’s a ripple effect. This is like dropping the rock in the pond and the ripple effects it makes after that.
a&e features
Pride & protest in Palm Springs: Behind the man who crafts queer joy as resistance
Jeff Hocker shares how his lifelong commitment to queer activism and creative drive revolutionized Palm Springs’ events into some of the hottest and most unapologetic celebrations of queer pride and resistance.
From the frontlines of LGBTQ+ activism in San Francisco to the glitter-glazed streets of Palm Springs, Jeff Hocker is so much more than an event producer. Swapping out the megaphones for microphones, Hocker is fearlessly fueling the movement through celebration and joy. The visionary behind some of Palm Spring’s most iconic festivities like Halloween on Arenas and Cinco de Mayo, Hocker blends jubilation with justice, glitter with grit. With a career that began alongside legends like Cleve Jones and Gilbert Baker, he’s spent decades turning parties into platforms and dance floors into declarations.
This year, his signature Halloween street soiree is upping its game, expanding into a full weekend experience with two distinct nights of revelry. On Friday Hocker is serving up MASKED, a costume-clad fête, and Saturday is UNMASKED, a deliciously uninhibited tribute to leather, fetish, and foxy fantasy. The Blade sat down with Hocker to talk about his journey and how joy itself can be a radical act of resistance in and of itself.
You’ve been a driving force behind some of Palm Springs’ most iconic events, like Halloween and Cinco de Mayo. What first drew you to this path, and how did you get started in the world of event production?
I actually grew up in the Bay Area and then moved to San Francisco. Early on, I became friends with people like Cleve Jones and Gilbert Baker. We put together the first Pink Saturday in San Francisco, and from there, we helped launch the city’s Halloween celebration. Eventually, we were all busy with different projects, so we passed it along to the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence.
One day, I saw a job listing in the paper that said, “Travel the world, promote Palm Springs.” I thought, “That’s me.” My friends had always said, “All you do is talk about Palm Springs—you should be getting paid to promote it.” So for four years, I traveled internationally to promote all aspects of Palm Springs.
After that whirlwind, I started my own business and returned to event production. I produced major events like Idyllwild Jazz in the Pines and was executive producer for Opera in the Park, which still happens today. I began developing my own events too, which gave me the freedom to work with the people and brands I believe in.
About 12 years ago, Dick Castcamp, a local bar owner in the Arenas District (who has since passed), approached me and said, “Jeff, we need you to take over Halloween.” The event had plateaued and needed someone with vision to elevate it, and showcase the district. That’s when Halloween Palm Springs became what it is today. We’ve grown it every year, bringing in Grammy-winning artists like Thelma Houston and Evelyn “Champagne” King. It’s not just a costume party – it’s a full-on world-class experience.
Halloween on Arenas is legendary – not just for costumes, but for drag shows, celebrity hosts, and even international porn stars. For those who’ve never been, what can they expect this year?
Halloween falls on a Friday this year for the first time in a while, so we’re making it a two-night event, and it also coincides with Leather Pride Weekend. We’ve themed the nights accordingly:
Friday, October 31st is MASKED – all about lavish costumes, masks, and our big costume contest.
Saturday, November 1st is UNMASKED – a leather, fetish, and fantasy street party. The street will fully transform overnight, and we’ll have some of the world’s top DJs like Hector Fonseca and Luciana, the Queen of Electro. They’ve both played circuit parties worldwide.
We’re calling it two nights of dance parties, because people come to dance. We’ll also have incredible culinary options, like TacoZarro, a kind of celebrity food truck chef who caters for Acrisure Arena and major events. And El Salvador Restaurant is coming too.
Friday’s lineup includes our costume contest (around 7:30 PM), followed by platinum-selling pop diva Dev – you probably know her from “Like a G6” and “In the Dark.” We also have DJ Juan from Beatbox SF, local favorite DJ Modgirl, and DJ Jeffrey. From start to finish, the street is going to be alive with music, energy, and celebration.
Palm Springs is evolving quickly, especially since COVID. How has the city’s changing scene shaped your events, and how have your events influenced that evolution?
When I worked for the Bureau of Tourism, the average age in Palm Springs was 58. Now it’s around 45. More people are moving here to open businesses, especially younger professionals from LA, San Diego, and New York.
The restaurant scene has exploded with chef-owned concepts, and the hotel industry is attracting investors who are completely renovating properties. We’re seeing more LGBTQ+ folks, of course, but also straight allies who want to be part of the vibrant, inclusive culture here.
It’s not just a retirement town anymore. There’s real opportunity, especially with things like the new College of the Desert West campus, which will offer programs in media and hospitality. That means local students can graduate and stay here, something that wasn’t possible before.
Switching gears – at a time when LGBTQ+ rights, especially trans rights, are under attack nationally, how do you see Palm Springs as a place of visibility and resistance?
I was fortunate to grow up in San Francisco and be around people like Cleve Jones, who taught me the power of civil disobedience and activism. I was in ACT UP. I worked on the first March on Washington. I was there when the gay choral movement started after Harvey Milk’s assassination.
Now, I sing with the Palm Springs Gay Men’s Chorus, and we use music as a form of social justice. Our community is under real threat again, particularly the trans community. Here in Palm Springs, we support them however we can – through clothing drives, visibility, advocacy.
I always say: when one group is targeted, others usually are too. Hate is rarely limited to one group. That’s why I work to bring people together – across race, religion, gender, identity – to stand against hate in all forms. That’s how we protect each other.
Speaking of activism, do you see celebrations that embrace joy in our community like Palm Springs’ Halloween on Arenas as a form of protest in themselves?
Absolutely. Joy is resistance. Visibility is resistance. Look at someone like Keith Haring. His graffiti and subway art were acts of protest. They made people feel something. That’s what art does. And I think joyful, unapologetic celebration is a form of protest too, especially when others try to silence or erase us.
Art has always been political. Take Gilbert Baker, who created the rainbow flag. When people dance in the streets, unapologetically queer, proudly in costume -that’s protest. That’s defiance. That’s hope.
The arts are under attack. PBS, Lincoln Center, institutions that shaped American culture are being defunded or devalued. We need to fight for them. And we need to bring back the basics – telling our stories, marching, being out. Harvey Milk said, “Tell everyone you’re gay.” Because once people realize their neighbor, their doctor, their contractor is LGBTQ+, it changes hearts and minds.
Young people today often feel like, “We’ve won our rights.” But rights can be taken away. They need to know who Harvey Milk was. They need to understand Stonewall. Because if we forget, we risk repeating history.
You mentioned working with Cleve Jones. Could you share something about him that the public might not know?
In the early days of the Names Project, I worked alongside him doing press, coordinating volunteers. It was hard. San Francisco and New York were the epicenters of HIV/AIDS. We were losing people constantly.
Cleve knew the power of creativity. The AIDS Memorial Quilt wasn’t just art. It was healing. It gave mothers, siblings, and friends a way to grieve and feel seen. It built community. And even today, with HIV still impacting lives, we need something like that again, something creative and soul-nourishing to remind people this crisis isn’t over.
Not all activism is protest signs and rallies. Sometimes, it’s music, fabric, dancing in the streets in your full authentic self. That’s protest too. That’s power.
Looking back on Halloween past, any standout performances, wild moments, or costumes that have been etched into your mind rent-free for all time?
Absolutely. One of the most incredible performances was Thelma Houston. Her agent told me, “She’s 80, but she’ll blow your mind.” And wow! She performed like she was 25. Just amazing energy and professionalism.
As for costumes, one year we had a group called School of Fish. About 12 people dressed identically in fish costumes, complete with fins and bubble guns. They moved in formation through the crowd like they were swimming. It was magical! And surprisingly, they didn’t win. Edward Scissorhands took the crown that year. But the creativity every year continues to blow me away.
With the national rise in anti-LGBTQ+ and especially anti-trans rhetoric and policy, how do you see Palm Springs as a beacon of resistance and visibility?
I was fortunate to come of age in San Francisco, working alongside people like Cleve Jones, who was a major part of the movement. I was involved in Act Up, the Names Project, and so many early HIV/AIDS protests. Civil disobedience was our tool. We marched, we organized, and we fought.
Now, in Palm Springs, we actively support our trans community with clothing drives, visibility events, and resource connections. We understand that hate rarely targets just one group. It’s intersectional. If they hate LGBTQ people, they also likely hate Black people, Jewish people, immigrants, and women’s rights.
My goal with events is to bring people together, to showcase joy as resistance, to build bridges, and to remind people: our power lies in community.
For folks who don’t throw events or have a big platform, do you have any advice for how they can participate in activism during the Halloween season?
Yes. Get engaged. Read up on local and national policies. Support political candidates who align with your values. Even a $1 donation helps. Volunteer. Show up. Protest.
And if you’re celebrating Halloween, do it loudly. Be creative, be bold. Wear costumes that send a message, or spark conversation. You never know who you might inspire.
Click here for info on Halloween on Arenas
a&e features
Bangers and beats and bears, oh my! Tom Goss dishes on his music and the queer community
As anti-LBGTQ+ rhetoric grows louder, Tom Goss is turning up the volume on queer joy and visibility through his music and live shows
Tom Goss is making space, making an impact, and making fantastic queer-centric music as always. Through his music and his career, Goss firmly and fiercely lifts up queer joy, the more tender side of masculinity. With his genre-fluid sound that reverberates from folk to hip-hop to unquestionably and unabashedly queer pop, Goss has become a pioneer of the perfectly performed unconventional.
Most recently, he performed at LA’s iconic Hotel Café, where he shared the stage with fellow queer music icons Rachael Sage and Kristen Ford. We had the opportunity to catch up with Tom to discuss the evolution of his music, the importance of representation, and why being “very, very gay” is a radical act in and of itself.
You’ve made for yourself quite the reputation as an unabashed narrator with your music. Could you describe the evolution of your sound over the years?
For me, the story is always at the forefront of my music. Each story demands a different treatment. Folk, Pop, Dance, Hip-Hop, Rock, nothing is off the table. Whatever is best for the story is the direction that I take.
I find it a little odd that we demand our artists find their voice, but we also demand that they never change their voice. My first record came out in 2006, which was almost 20 years ago. My tastes, interests, relationships, and experiences have changed drastically over those 20 years. It makes sense that the music I make would change along with it.
Ultimately, I try to craft memorable music that is uplifting and positive. Whether that’s Gay Stuff (my July release, a gay pop summertime bop), Bear Soup (my May release, a hip-hop bear twerk anthem), or my upcoming record, which is queer Americana. It’s all a part of the journey and I hope you have as much fun as me!
Your music has graced many film soundtracks (including the full score for 2017’s Hooked), performed internationally, and has made gorgeously gay music videos. How do you approach film projects vs. live performances?
Film has pushed my idea of what style of music elevates a scene. It forces you to write differently, play instruments differently, and produce differently. As people, we tend to find the lane in which we are most comfortable, and put life on cruise control. As an artist, that is the worst possible thing. Scoring films, or making videos, forces you to work with other people, understand other perspectives and ideas, and grow as a result.
My music video “Son of a Preacher Man” was probably the first time I wrote something with the video in mind first. My director and longtime collaborator, Michael Serrato, had an idea for the “Son of a Preacher Man” music video. I thought it was awesome and went to work arranging the song in a way that would support the visuals, rather than the other way around. It was very powerful. Now I write songs with video concepts first all the time, it’s such a fun way to work!
You’re quite the celebrity in the bear community. That said, what does this recognition mean to you and how, if so, does it influence or fuel your creative process?
I feel honored to be a part of the bear community. It’s full of the most beautiful, creative, smart, and sensitive people I have ever met. Anytime I speak of love or attraction, it’s about bears. I do not understand how to love without bears. Without them, the world is black and white. With them, it is overflowing with color and joy. Love fuels everything in my life. There is no Tom Goss without bears.
Do you think labels like “bear musician” are empowering, limiting, or something else entirely?
It is not my job to label myself. I make music, I tell stories, I love those around me, and I create art as a result of that which I love. I really try to focus on those things rather than anything else.
Your music can challenge traditional (or, arguably, outdated) concepts of masculinity. Was this intentional or, rather, something that emerged over time?
It’s very intentional. I have, from the very beginning, worked to have a diverse cast of characters in my projects. I believe the way we see beauty is learned. The reason we are judgmental towards people of size, or color, or expression, is because we were taught to. That’s easy to understand.
The flipside is, the way we change the way we see beauty, is by showing other forms of beauty. That is my job. I want to take the things the world says aren’t beautiful, and capture them in a way that utilizes the same tools we use to make traditionally beautiful people appear beautiful.
I can’t tell you how many messages I’ve gotten over the years that say:
“oh, I didn’t know that I liked [insert marginally racist, sizeist, transphobic name here] but that person in your video is HOT!”
And OF COURSE THEY ARE! Stop trying to find the things you don’t like about someone and find what makes them beautiful.
Gaga has her monsters and Beyonce has her Hive. What name, either collective or plural, would you give to your devoted fanbase (assuming that one does not yet exist)?
Friends. The idea of artist idolatry makes me uncomfortable.
Can you share with us some ways that you prepare yourself for a live show? Any pre-show rituals – Pagan, Wiccan, or otherwise?
Ha! Not really. Usually I’m running around and laughing with folks until I look at my clock and realize that I need to stop and perform.
Can you share with us one lyric that you’ve written that sent chills running down your own spine?
Joan of Arc was trans as fuck.
He cut his hair and picked up arms.
Walked across an empire, fulfilled his destiny.
I play it alongside Joe Stevens, an iconic trans singer, songwriter, and multi-instrumentalist who has long been a hero of mine. Look him up. Support him.
You use your voice and your platform not just to make fantastically fabulous music but to hold a mic to queer voices and their stories. How do your roles of artist and advocate intersect and amplify each other?
I want to tell stories that other people are afraid to tell. I want to tell stories that speak to my experience and impact the way that I see the world. Over the course of my career, that has meant queer stories.
Frankly, there is no community that is more vibrant, diverse, creative, resilient, and dynamic than the queer community. It’s really that simple.
With anti-LBGTQI+ rhetoric spreading like the flames of a wildfire, do you feel a sense of urgency to advocate through your music?
My goal over the next couple of years is to be very, very gay, very, very queer, and very, very honest about the things that make me happy in that identity. We have to provide hope to people in a time when things feel so hopeless. We also have to protect our trans community. They are very much under attack.
If there is one thing that you’d wish for the younger generation of our queer community to take away from your shows, your music, and your career, what would it be?
Be yourself, no matter how hard it seems. Don’t let anyone take you away from you. It’s ok to play. Find that which brings you joy and explore it to the fullest.
You are beautiful and valuable. I’m so happy to be in this world with you.
And lastly, how will you be celebrating Halloween month this year?
I’ll be touring in California (LA, San Diego, San Francisco) and then heading to Florida for Cannonball. It’s going to be a fun, bear-filled month!
a&e features
Jennifer Lopez talks ‘Kiss of the Spider Woman,’ queer representation
Latest version of iconic story ‘a love letter to humanity’
With its riveting storyline and gorgeous dance scenes, it’s no wonder that one of the standout films this awards season is “Kiss of the Spider Woman.” Originally a bold novel published by Argentine writer Manuel Puig in 1976, it was adapted into a play and then a screenplay. In 1985, the film earned four Academy Award nominations, with William Hurt winning Best Actor — the first ever awarded for a portrayal of an openly queer character.
Ten years later, in 1993, the story was turned into a Broadway musical starring the iconic Chita Rivera, and won several Tony Awards. Fast forward to 2025: for this new version, Jennifer Lopez and Diego Luna both play dual roles in the film, which also stars newcomer, Tonatiuh.
The film takes place in 1983, during Argentina’s troubled times; two prisoners are forced to share a confined cell in Buenos Aires. Valentín (Luna), a Marxist revolutionary, is committed to his political idealology, despite being tortured and deprived by the guards. Molina (Tonatiuh), a gay window dresser who is in jail because of his sexual orientation, survives the insanity by fantasizing about his favorite movie, telling Valentin all the details. While their connection begins as a way for them to emotionally escape, it grows deeper, in the most profound way.
Through stories, confessions, and sacrifice, the duo discover unexpected tenderness and the possibility of love in a place designed to annihilate the human spirit.
“These two men who could not be different in every single way, everything is stripped away from them in their lives, the politics, class, education, all this stuff goes away, and they start to see themselves as individuals,” said Bill Condon, the Academy Award-winning writer-director known for such films as “Gods and Monsters,” “Chicago,” “Dreamgirls” and “Beauty and the Beast,” who was deeply moved as he wrote the script.
Producing the updated version of the film was vital to Lopez, who is also an executive producer. “I think it’s more relevant than ever,” she said at a recent Golden Globes press event.
“The idea of a trans or gay character in this movie…the kind of divisiveness that we’ve experienced in the world in the past few years. A story about two people who are thrown together, who are so opposite, who are so different from each other. And find the humanity and fall in love with each other. Who would never probably even find themselves in the same circles. That’s really important to have queer representation in movies. In my own family, I know how important that is for people to see that.”
Tonatiuh, who steals every scene he is in, lost 45 pounds for the role.
“I think there’s a certain moment that’s happening right now that we need to remind ourselves that dignity and humanity and love transcend gender,” he said. “They transcend sexual orientation. They transcend all of those things. And so, yes, we deal with queer themes in our film, but I do think that it is a love letter to diversity. It is a love letter to humanity as a whole.”
Condon loved every version of “Kiss of the Spider Woman,” each of them was “revolutionary” for its time.
“But when you read that novel, it’s taken us this long to really catch up to what it was saying. And specifically, this was well before the election season and well before we knew what was going to happen. But it was clear that trans people were going to be demonized, that they were going to be a part of the conversation…it did feel that this was something that was bubbling up and happening. So that’s what made it feel very urgent.”
Lopez added: “The revolution that you’re saying that we need right now is exactly the reason why I think the movie is so important right now for people to see. Because it reminds you that it’s really, at the end of the day, about two people getting along and falling in love, when you really forget about all of the other things, that we’re all just human. And it is about humanity.”
Tonatiuh hopes that the film inspires people to step up.
“We constantly see the news, we see everything that’s going around and we wonder, ‘What is it that I can do? I’m just one person.’ But this isolationist mentality is the thing that gets us here. Every one of us has little actions to take and little moments to do. And especially in a moment where Latinos in general in this country are experiencing massive negative public relations, just attack after attack after attack, it’s really wonderful to showcase what Latino dignity is and reminding people of, like the talent, the joy that our culture adds to the United States and the world.”
a&e features
Sitting Down with Mariachi Arcoiris, Los Angeles’ only LGBTQ+ mariachi
This historic group breaks down their music and how they stay hopeful during such uncertain times.
Few things in this world are as powerful as a song.
For centuries, marginalized communities have used music as a way to come together, as a rallying cry to remember the power they hold against those who’d oppress them. And in a Los Angeles filled with music, few groups resound as loudly as Mariachi Arcoiris.
Composed of passionate violins, bellowing trumpets, and amazingly flamboyant uniforms, mariachi encapsulates the complexities of Latine music and the strength of this community. It unfortunately hasn’t always been welcoming to queer performers, but recent years have seen artists merge their identities to create a beautifully intersectional sound. Arcoiris is one of these; this group made history 11 years ago when it was formed as the world’s first all-queer mariachi band. In the time since they’ve inspired thousands, not only gaining fame through their endlessly viral performances but soothing generational wounds with their sound…and it’s been devastating to watch them struggle, along with all of LA’s Latine community, amidst violent ICE Raids and national discrimination.
The Los Angeles Blade was honored to sit down with members of Mariachi Arcoiris to hear about the impact of their music and what it’s been like watching their identities be targeted. They detail how horrible it’s been seeing LA come under attack in recent months — but also how they haven’t lost hope. Because, as any good mariachi will tell you: music heals. And Mariachi Arcoiris hopes that their songs can be the soundtrack to Los Angeles fighting back against those hurting it today.
“I thought to myself, ‘That’s it. I’ve had it — I’m going to start a mariachi where people like me can be welcomed,” Said Carlos Samaniego, who founded Mariachi Arcoiris in 2014. He explained how this group was created in response to homophobia; he’d previously left numerous other mariachis after facing prejudice due to his sexuality. Refusing to allow antiquated ideals to halt his dreams, he founded this group to create a haven for other musicians who’d been refused the spotlight they deserved.
Musicians like Samantha ‘Sammi’ Bautista, who traveled across California to audition for the group the moment she turned 18. She explained what many called a rash move, saying, “It had been a dream of mine…being gay openly, playing along with people in my community. It’s very powerful, [being] ourselves with each other and [creating] this music.” And it’s powerful to watch as well; along with an interview, the Los Angeles Blade was welcomed to sit in on Mariachi Arcoiris’ practice — one of the many they conduct each week. It was an uplifting experience to see a group that encompasses so many identities being used as political fodder come together in laughter and heartfelt performance. Evident in every moment was how much these performers care for one another, with member Yalitza ‘Yaya’ Vasquez-Lopez saying, “This is where we can always come back to and forget about everything else happening in the world.”
It’s a kind of reprieve that Mariachi Arcoiris hopes to give its audience. “We’re really just activating something powerful within us and within our people,” continued Yaya. “And I think that that is resistance in itself, because [when] you start singing along to a song, you [realize]: I’m not alone.” It quickly became clear that this was the mission of Mariachi Arcoiris, to encourage others to live as openly as these musicians do onstage — an openness that, unfortunately, many Angelinos currently view as dangerous.
It’s difficult to describe the gut-wrenching anxiety that has filled LA in previous months. The city has become a hotbed of ICE Raids and the focus of national racism, with each day bringing new stories of hardworking individuals being kidnapped and denied their rights. It’s made many Latine communities reluctant to show pride for their culture in fear of it making them a target. And not only have these attacks affected the city’s residents on a personal level, but as Carlos stresses, on a professional one as well.
“The majority of my musicians do this for a living,” said the founder. “This is how they pay their rent, their food, their gas — everything. Because of the ICE raids, there have been many cancellations of performances.” He emphasized it’s not just them; mariachis across the city have found themselves struggling financially as institutions grow fearful of hosting such a bold example of culture. And not only is their race being targeted, but Mariachi Arcoiris is made up of queer and trans individuals, identities that face more and more attacks from politicians determined to paint their authenticity as something insidious. They’ve found themselves as intersectional targets, enduring a hateful climate that has caused so many people to give up hope…
So why hasn’t Mariachi Arcoiris?
“It hasn’t affected us morally at all,” clarified Yaya, when asked how these attacks have impacted the group’s willingness to perform. “[We are] a chosen family, and it’s brought us closer together to just know that this is where we belong.” The members expressed how they are constantly doing their best to protect one another — and it doesn’t stop with the group. Sammi described how Arcoiris has joined many other mariachi groups in consistently appearing at ICE protests and political demonstrations across LA. They do this all while still loudly broadcasting their queer and trans identities, knowing that the representation their group was founded upon is more important now than ever. This is not to say they’re immune to worry; each member held (utterly justified) concerns around their rights and freedoms. But Yaya reassures that it’s their shared love of the artform — and one another — that keeps them going, saying, “Mariachi is joy, pain, sadness…but also celebration and resistance. Especially today, especially in the US, that’s what mariachi is.”
In a Los Angeles mired in fearful uncertainty, Mariachi Arcoiris is committed to remaining a mainstay of both LGBTQ+ and Latine culture. The group recognizes their future is uncertain; they are still facing reduced performance requests, and each day brings more news of attacks on their communities. Yet they know that music is their best form of resistance, that the melodies they bring to thousands are a reminder of the power we have when we stand together, unafraid to show our most authentic selves. They find solace in this liberating sound, creating it daily to empower not only each other but their countless fans worldwide.
And they want every listener to remember that, if they ever feel alone or like they’ve lost their community, all they have to do is sing along.
a&e features
Jennifer Tilly on the legacy of queer neo-noir ‘Bound’ nearly 30 years later: “It was considered detrimental to your career to play a lesbian character”
Tilly also recalls the AIDS epidemic and Project Angel Food’s crucial work.
Before accepting the top honor at this year’s Project Angel Food’s Angel Awards, Oscar-nominated and GLAAD award-winning actor Jennifer Tilly (Bullets Over Broadway) reflected on the lasting influence of the 1996 queer neo-noir Bound, which she starred in alongside Gina Gershon (Showgirls).
“When we went in, they said to us, ‘You will not believe the actresses who refused to come in and read’ because it was considered detrimental to your career to play a lesbian character,” Tilly told The Blade on the Sept. 27 red carpet at Paramount Studios in Los Angeles. “But I was astonished because I thought, ‘This is the best script that I’ve read in such a long time with one of the best roles for women.’”
Tilly and Gershon co-starred as two women who fall in love and concoct a scheme to steal millions of dollars in mob money, and the film was directed by the Wachowski Sisters before they became household names. “They were first-time directors — nobody knew anything about them,” Tilly said. “But it’s one of my favorite performances of all time, and I’m really happy the new generation is beginning to discover it. It’s been on a lot of lists of the best film noir, the best lesbian movies.”
The Wachowskis came out as trans decades later, in 2012 and 2016, respectively. While Tilly recalls being surprised, when she reflects on her time working with them, she claims she should’ve known: “They wrote two of the most brilliant parts for women that I’ve ever read. So they had that soul, that heart and sensibility. And then after they did The Matrix and became global superstars. They’re so talented, and I’m always happy to see films that they have created.”
Tilly being recognized with the Angel Award is a full-circle moment, as she has been a supporter of the L.A.-based organization since the ‘90s. Past recipients include Elizabeth Taylor, Sharon Stone, and Jamie Lee Curtis, just to name a few.
“I was just so touched and honored and thrilled because I have been working with them for over 30 years, but I never really thought that I would get an award like this because there are so many people that work for them,” Tilly said. “They have a lot of support from the celebrity community.”
When Project Angel Food was founded in 1989 by Marianne Williamson, the organization started out delivering food to people affected by HIV/AIDS. Tilly recalls that time in the world and the impact the charity made.
“I mean, we were all losing friends. People didn’t understand a lot about AIDS, so people afflicted with the disease were a little bit pariahs because people were afraid,” Tilly said. “So the idea of having a charity that delivers food to these people who are housebound — they’re not only delivering nourishment or physical sustenance, they’re also delivering emotional sustenance. Because for some of these people, the food delivery people are maybe the only people they see all week.”
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The documentary ‘Dear Viv’ tells the story of a Queen and her community
The Vivienne’s Drag Race sisters speak about her legacy and the impact of drug abuse on the LGBTQ+ community
In a year filled with hardships for the LGBTQ+ community, few days have been as collectively devastating as when it was announced that The Vivienne, winner of RuPaul’s Drag Race UK and international superstar, had passed away.
The Vivienne’s impact transcended borders; after winning the inaugural season of Drag Race UK, the Queen broke barriers with her performances in theater and television. In just a few years, she became a mainstay of international queer culture, a rise to stardom that Pete Williams’ documentary Dear Viv does its best to honor.
The doc gathers The Vivienne’s loved ones to speak about her impact on modern culture and how devastating it was to lose such a powerful light in their lives. The feature is a beautiful memorial of a life taken too soon — and it’s also a call-to-action. Because the documentary details how The Vivienne’s struggles with addiction led to her death, it hopes to not only commemorate a legend but raise awareness of the rampant drug abuse that fills the queer community.
The Los Angeles Blade got the chance to sit down with some of the other UK stars featured in the documentary to hear not only what The Vivienne meant to them, but what they hope this legacy can do for thousands of LGBTQ+ individuals today.
“We always knew she was destined to be a star…and just to see her achieve her dreams, it couldn’t have happened to a better person,” said Michael Marouli, runner-up of Drag Race UK season five and long-time friend of The Vivienne. It was a sentiment shared by not only her close friends, but the late performer’s thousands of fans; viewers first met The Vivienne when she strutted onto Drag Race UK season one, marvelling with her talent before eventually winning and becoming the country’s first Drag Superstar. “Everything that she did from her crown onwards, she did it to the utmost excellence,” agreed Cheryl Hole, another series alumni who spoke in the documentary. “From her TV work to her theater runs…I knew the future was just going to be so bright and so full for her.”
And it was a bright future indeed, as The Vivienne’s tenure on Drag Race was followed up with appearances in other hit UK shows, features in multiple popular films, and even a starring role in the West End’s production of The Wizard of Oz. The early portion of Dear Viv highlights these successes and the hard work it took to achieve them, following its central figure as she grew from a teenager performing underage at drag bars to the iconic Queen fans know her as today. It emphasizes how she paved the way for so many other queer celebrities, making it all the more gut-wrenching when viewers remember what is to follow all this success.
Advocates have been speaking up for decades about the disastrous impact hard drugs have on the LGBTQ+ community. Since the 1970s, studies have shown how party-centric venues, being some of the only inclusive spaces, combined with mainstream society’s mistreatment of queer folk, make LGBTQ+ people particularly vulnerable to drug and alcohol addiction. It’s what has led queer communities to have some of the highest rates of drug addiction in the world — yet since this problem has gone largely unaddressed, many of the people facing this addiction are left to deal with these issues in solitude.
Dear Viv not only details the Queen’s multi-year struggle with addiction and the relapse that led to her death, but also how loved ones are using her legacy to save others from fighting their demons alone. The Vivienne’s blood sister, Chanel Williams, is leading the charge; not only has she appeared on numerous talk shows raising awareness around the dangers of ketamine, but she has created the House of The Vivienne, an addiction support group working to combat drug addiction in the UK’s queer community.
“I truly believe what Viv’s family are doing right now is incredible,” said Cheryl Hole, the usually sardonic Queen growing serious when discussing this important advocacy. “[This is] a place where people can come for narcotics, anonymous support, and truly take away the stigma of using drugs.” It’s a goal that has gone worldwide; in the months since The Vivienne’s death advocacy organizations across the U.S. have spotlighted the harmful impact of drug addiction and the role we all play in assisting LGBTQ+ people through recovery. It’s unfortunate that these resources were not available when The Vivienne herself needed them, but it’s why her loved ones are determined to help the countless others they know are struggling through the same fight she did.
Beyond anything else, Dear Viv is a heartwrenching, uplifting memoriam for someone who truly changed LGBTQ+ representation for the better. “Whether she was talking, whether she was performing, whether she was just there visually as a gorgeous presence, you were in safe hands with her,” continued Hole, tearfully describing how it was The Vivienne showing viewers that LGBTQ+ performers were just like them which allowed other UK Queens to achieve similar fame. And when it comes to her struggles with drug abuse and the advocacy her death has spurned on, the Queens echo in interview the documentary’s mission statement: reach out. There is help available even when it seems like there’s not, and people like The Vivienne’s family are fighting to make these resources more visible every single day.
While the entire documentary embodies this message of seeking help, nobody articulates it better than Michael Marouli themself. “I promise you it gets better when you speak to somebody,” said the Queen tearfully as her interview came to a close. “I can imagine how scary it is and how you might feel alone, but once you speak to someone, it does get better — I promise. So please, please, please, if you are struggling, seek the help you need. And there are people out there who are willing to do the work to get you where you need to be beautiful.”
A statement that The Vivienne would be proud of.
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David Hernandez on sobriety, vulnerability, and the power of music to heal
In honor of National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Month, American Idol finalist David Hernandez opens up about his own journey from addiction through sobriety and the importance of visibility, vulnerability, and community in the recovery process.
Fans remember David Hernandez as the velvet-voiced finalist who lit up American Idol season 7, but behind the glam of the bright lights is an artist on a deeply personal journey. In this candid convo, Hernandez opens up about sobriety, the healing power of music, and why vulnerability might just be the bravest thing you can wear (aside from sunscreen). With his latest single, “Feel It All,” Hernandez is hitting emotional truths and offering a bit of hope to anyone who’s ever felt like they were singing solo.
September is National Alcohol and Drug Addiction Recovery Awareness Month. What does that mean to you personally, and why is it important to bring public awareness to it?
It means a lot to me as someone who’s in recovery. There’s still a lot of stigma around admitting you have a problem, whether it’s alcoholism or addiction. Vulnerability is difficult because people can weaponize it, and that makes honesty really scary. It takes a lot of bravery and truth to be strong enough to share your story publicly.
I think it’s beautiful that there’s a month dedicated to people living with this affliction. It gives us visibility, and it gives others, who may not understand addiction, the chance to learn more. Awareness fosters empathy, and empathy leads to change.
Your single “Feel It All” explores themes of emotional pain and self-reclamation. How has acceptance played a role in your healing?
When you live in your truth and authenticity, you finally give yourself space to process and unpack trauma, whether it’s childhood, young adult, or current-day trauma. And there’s a lot of it just from existing in the world.
The hardest part is often being honest with yourself. We’re conditioned to push things down so we can hustle, present well, and avoid vulnerability. But being honest, with yourself first, starts the healing process. That honesty is the crux of recovery.
For me, it’s not just about being in recovery, but about being a man who came from a single-parent household, with addiction in the family and a lot of unhealed wounds. When I started owning my story, I stopped relying on unhealthy coping mechanisms, like alcohol, drugs, sex, sugar, or even external validation. Now, I’m learning how to cope in a healthy, sustainable way.
You originally created “Feel It All” as a form of personal therapy. What made you decide to release it publicly?
Honestly, I still go back and forth, even now I’m like, “Should I be saying all this?” As an artist, there’s always some level of doubt.
But like Nina Simone said, “It’s the artist’s duty to reflect the times.” That includes our internal worlds too. If I’m feeling something deeply, chances are, thousands, if not millions, of others are feeling it too.
The song started on a treadmill, literally. I was at the gym and began writing melodies in my head. I called my friend Trump Park, who produced my last album Don’t @ Me (2022), and invited him over. Normally, we’d open a bottle of tequila while working, but this time, we drank soda water with lime and just vibed.
I didn’t intend to release it. But when I played it for a few people and saw them crying—not because they were sad for me, but because they related, I realized it wasn’t just about me. It was healing me, and maybe it could help heal someone else too.
That’s the beauty of authenticity; it resonates. “Feel It All” isn’t sugar-coated. The first verse asks, “Who am I without the substances?” It’s honest and raw. And I hope it reaches someone, maybe a young kid in Middle America who doesn’t have the resources or the representation I lacked growing up.
Speaking of representation, the music video embraces themes of vulnerability and community. Why was it important to include that visually, and how has community shaped your own recovery?
Community has been everything for me. Growing up biracial, half Mexican, half white, I often felt like I was straddling two worlds. I also knew I was gay from a young age, and I didn’t see anyone in the media who looked, acted, or felt like me. There wasn’t representation for people like me, biracial, queer, artistic, emotional.
The video includes drag nuns from the Sisters of Perpetual Indulgence, who work to de-stigmatize religion in the LGBTQ+ community, especially for those of us with religious trauma. It also features people from different backgrounds, ages, identities, and inferred traumas. It was important to me to reflect the diversity of recovery and the shared humanity underneath it all.
Representation matters. It allows people to feel seen, which makes healing possible. We’re wired for connection. What better way to connect than to recognize that our similarities far outweigh our differences?
What’s one common misconception about sobriety or recovery you’d like to clear up?
That it’s a choice. It’s not.
Addiction is a disease. I’ve seen incredibly successful people with full lives succumb to it, not because they didn’t love their lives, but because the disease doesn’t discriminate.
People often say, “Why can’t they just stop?” If it were that easy, everyone would stop. But it’s not about willpower, it’s about mental illness, trauma, and brain chemistry. It requires treatment, support, compassion, and community.
You mentioned relapse. What would you say to someone who just relapsed yesterday and is struggling with shame?
I’d say: There is always a seat for you at the table of recovery.
Relapse doesn’t make you a failure. It’s part of the journey for many of us, including me. Shame isolates you, and isolation is what the disease wants, it wants you to stay silent and spiral.
Reach out to someone in the sober community and tell the truth: “I used again, and I need help.” That’s it. Let someone guide you to the next step, whether it’s a meeting or a conversation. Time isn’t a tool—whether it’s 10 days or 10 years, recovery is about today. Focus on this moment.
What are some daily practices that keep you grounded?
I start my day with the Serenity Prayer, sometimes five times a day. I get gratitude lists from sober friends and try to write my own when I can. I talk to my sponsor regularly, check in with others, and ask how they’re doing, because focusing on someone else helps me get out of my own head.
I exercise, lots of cardio and hiking. I cook. I have a skincare routine that’s like a ritual at night. I keep to-do lists with Sharpie markers, it helps keep my thoughts from running wild.
These are small things, but they’re meaningful. And when I stay grounded in routine, I stay further away from the chaos.
How has your music evolved throughout your sobriety journey?
I used to rely on a drink before studio sessions or performances, to calm my nerves. Now, I lean on meditation, prayer, and letting myself feel uncomfortable until the feeling passes. And guess what? I don’t die from it.
My relationship with music has deepened. I’m more intentional. I finish songs faster. I record at home. I feel more connected to the process, to the source. I think my higher power shows up in my creativity now.
That said, I still love my past catalog, it represents different parts of me. But now, I’m learning how to channel something more grounded, more real. And I think that shows in the music.
Do you see “Feel It All” as part of a larger project, or more of a standalone release?
Right now, I’m just letting it live and breathe. But next year is the 10-year anniversary of my single “Beautiful,” and we’re doing a remix with a special guest artist. “Feel It All” and “Beautiful” both promote healing and inclusivity, so they’d absolutely belong on the same album. Whether or not there’s a full project, they’re part of the same emotional journey.
What would you say to fans who are struggling with addiction but don’t yet see a way out?
There is a way out. It starts with honesty, with yourself and with someone you trust.
Help is available. At the end of the “Feel It All” music video, we list organizations that can offer support. Even if they can’t help directly, they can point you in the right direction. You’re not alone. You just have to take that first brave step and say, “I think I need help.”
If fans only remember one lyric from “Feel It All,” which would you want it to be?
The second verse:
“I don’t need someone to judge my past,
But the way I’m living just can’t last.
I’m tired of lying, to end up in a place where I’m dying.”
That lyric captures the pain and urgency of knowing you’re in trouble, but also the hope that comes from admitting it.
Another part says:
“And if I’m being honest with myself,
I’ve been doing things that ain’t good for my health.”
That line isn’t just about drugs or alcohol—it’s about everything we use to numb: sex, binge eating, validation. Anything for a quick dopamine hit. But none of that heals us.
Can you name a few of the support organizations listed in the video that fans can turn to?
Absolutely. Here are a few:
988 Suicide & Crisis Lifeline – Call or text 988
West Hollywood Recovery Center
And honestly, people can reach out to me. I’m happy to connect them with resources.
Check out the full video:
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